Good Day, Good People...
I hope your Mother's Day breakfasts or brunches are or were awesome and joyful. 🙂
HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!!
She opens her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness. In today's world, it might seem like an odd trait to cultivate, but I’ve been thinking lately about how “softness” is missing in a lot of today’s women, why it’s a powerful trait, and why I’m proposing to become a softer woman. Please hear me out, this is all love💜.
The pursuit of equality has robbed us of more than it gave. With all the hear me roaring going on, and the clawing our way up the corporate ladder, proving that “anything you can do I can do better” to all the men who wanted to “hold us down”, we’ve become hard, tough, independent women, and in our own delusion, we applaud ourselves for these qualities instead of mourning the death of our naturally-powerful attributes. There I've said it.
Equal doesn’t have to be the same (6+1=7 and so does 4+3). That’s where we got sorely misguided. As far as men and women being different, I sure am glad God made us that way, and I’m very thankful to have a future husband somewhere out there who recognizes that! To become more like men doesn’t make us equal any more than wearing a wig makes them more able to bear children.
We are already equal. JUST DIFFERENT. That difference is (or maybe was?) incredible! Femininity is a unique gift that only we were given. Our softness and all that encapsulates is a powerful force, it is a strength we already possess and don’t have to fight for.
I have found that even those of us, including myself, who would never think of ourselves as trying to act like men, have still been subtly influenced and tempted to throw off our feminine traits at times in favor of tougher, more manly ones.
Realistically, and ironically, true femininity is strong. A woman can be soft and strong, tender and tough, and dignified, all at the same time. She can live fearlessly, be in shape, be a sharp business woman, manage her home with wisdom and be her husband’s most trusted companion, all while seeking to be soft, feminine and lovely.
I think what a woman studies, reads, thinks about and seeks after is an innate part of her and will manifest itself. Because energy flows where attention goes.
Now for a bit of a confession. I am writing this post to myself, un poquito (there's that high school Spanish coming out🙂). I’m just hoping it may resonate with you too. Although I have not struggled, with a reactionary personality, raising my voice and answering harshly. I can see how living in an environment, a marriage where I did not feel protected made me at times overreact to things more than I should have and not choose gentleness when I should have.
I am thankful my situation was not as harsh as others. The mindset I found myself, in which weeding my garden of behaviors was required, was tiring. C.S. Lewis said, “The best way to acquire a virtue is to pretend you already have it.” This I did for a while, to practice habits I wanted to cultivate. Thankfully it worked.
For many, it is deeply rooted. Each day when some women get up they are fighting a battle against themselves. For many they don't even realize it and for others they don't see any problem with it. To those women, all I can say is, it's OK to celebrate our femininity with joy and gratitude.
My aim is gentleness and softness. I want to be known as a woman who had “the law of kindness on her tongue.”
I want to be known as a woman who spoke well of others, honored others even if they weren’t present, found the beauty even when it was hidden, and inspired those around me to live more intentionally. I want to be a steady mom, expecting much, forgiving much, leading my children into adulthood with firmness and resolve, love and laughter, determination and perseverance. I want a constitution as strong as steel, and a demeanor as soft as a dove.
I’m thankful God didn’t make me the same as my future husband. I can assure you, husbands are thankful too.
Equal but vastly different. 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Light ☀️ Love 🤟🏽 and Harmony ☯️